The Most Important Thing About Me
November 24, 2010
This year for me has been an emotional roller coaster. I often wonder if this is a “season” or if it’s just the reality of human existence. My guess is the latter. In the midst of traveling, circumstances that have been out of my control, and beholding suffering, I’ve been trying to find a place of rest. I long for communion with Jesus that transcends circumstance and the inevitable storms of life.
My tendency throughout my journey has been to numb my heart (false rest). This can look like keeping incredibly busy, spending all my spare time with people, or gorging on entertainment. I admit I have done all of those things this year, but in the midst of it all I keep reaching for Jesus. I keep striving to fight against those tendencies and place my broken and weak heart before Him.
In the midst of one of those reaches several weeks ago, I pulled out “The Knowledge of the Holy” by AW Tozer. I stopped short at the first line:
“What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.”
Somehow, this statement got me back on track in a way that I needed so desperately. I have thought about it repeatedly since then. When you don’t know what to do, set your eyes on Jesus (2 Chron. 20:12). Beholding & declaring Jesus is always our way forward.
So, who is my Beloved to me?
He is faithful, exceedingly faithful. He never leaves me. He is always working everything together for my good, conforming me to His image as I choose to love Him (Romans 8). He hedges me in and afflicts me in faithfulness (Hosea 2 & Psalm 119). He speaks tenderly to me and upholds me with His right arm. At times His works are invisible to me, at times He whispers, and at times He thunders. Always, He is good.
He is true. Never has He, and never will He, lie to me. He’s not like mere man (Numbers 23:19). I can trust His Word. I can trust His actions. He lived a blameless life and then chose to die for me. I can trust a God who has bled for me. I can trust a God who IS truth. He is who He says He is.
He is humble. The fact that a divine God chose to put on flesh forever, in order to raise up kings and priests (as His family) astounds me. Not only has He died for me, but He lives to intercede for me on a regular basis (Hebrews 7). My God is a God who washes my feet, cleanses my heart, and shepherd’s me (John 13, Psalm 23, John 10). Have you ever heard of a God who is a Shepherd?
He is beautiful. I long to be captured by something bigger than the day to day and Jesus is my answer to that ache. He is beautiful to my eyes – dazzling & radiant, shining like a jasper diamond, surrounded by an emerald rainbow and living creatures (Revelation 4). His eyes burn with fire (Revelation 1). Christ is beautiful to my heart – His Name is my comfort & if I really run into His name, I will find fascination.
He is attentive to my cry. Knowing that a God who owns the cattle on a thousand hills (Psalm 50), He who is seated above the circle of the earth (Isaiah 40), the one who created all things by the Word of His power (John 1), is listening to me (me?!) is terrifying and glorious. I have the ear of the One who can actually bring change (Psalm 18). I have everything I need if I have Jesus (2 Peter 1:3).
This list could go on and on and on… but in the midst of the whirlwind of life I seek to come back to the first things. I long to behold Him and bless Him. I long to love Him and declare His name. What I believe about Jesus and living like I believe it, is the most important thing about me.
Caring For Your Introvert
June 6, 2009
I had a long day at home today – all to myself. It was glorious. This article came to mind, so I thought I’d share it with all of you. It’s called ‘Caring For Your Introvert’.
An excerpt from the article:
Do you know someone who needs hours alone every day? Who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but seems awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk? Who has to be dragged to parties and then needs the rest of the day to recuperate? Who growls or scowls or grunts or winces when accosted with pleasantries by people who are just trying to be nice?If so, do you tell this person he is “too serious,” or ask if he is okay? Regard him as aloof, arrogant, rude? Redouble your efforts to draw him out?
If you answered yes to these questions, chances are that you have an introvert on your hands—and that you aren’t caring for him properly.
I am VERY much an introvert, and married to someone who is not. If you are in the same boat that I am – you may want to pass this along to your spouse. 
One last quote:
For introverts, to be alone with our thoughts is as restorative as sleeping, as nourishing as eating. Our motto: “I’m okay, you’re okay—in small doses.”
Post On Entertainment & ‘The Dark Knight’
August 17, 2008
This was a great “linkage” post by Justin Taylor:
(Below is the post in full:)
The World’s Disappointing Stimulants
Ray Ortlund on the movie, The Dark Knight:
I learned nothing. I was not enriched in any way.
. . . I’m weary with the world’s disappointing stimulants. I want more of Christ.
Michael Spencer comments:
I have begun to suspect that we can’t see the entertainment idolatry in our own lives.
We’ve decided to talk about “how to relate Christ to movies” and so on, which I don’t deny is a worthwhile pursuit, and I believe the glory and truth of God shines through all kinds of cultural windows.
But there’s just a lot- a LOT- of garbage out there. A lot of lies. Distortion. A lot of very bad story telling. A lot of poorly executed entertainment. A lot of humor and excitement drummed up from the lowest common denominators: sex, violence, greed. A lot of wasted minutes, hours and days.
I know Christian young people who live- live- in the world of movies, tv and games. And when I’ve suggested they might be wasting chunks of their lives with what wasn’t worthy of their thoughts, I’ve been pooh-poohed.
Don’t get me wrong. I want Christians engaging art and entertainment. I want Christians making good art and entertainment.
But when we are supposedly deeply moved by something that, at its core, isn’t deeply moving, isn’t redemptive, isn’t part of the grand story, but is just a vast, pretentious, technologically overwhelming retelling of the worst kind of human story, I want to have the backbone to say so.
Ortlund did. Good for him.
F. Frangipane On Spiritual Warfare
January 25, 2008
“Victory begins with the name of Jesus on our lips. It is consummated by the nature of Jesus in our hearts. Most Christians only engage in spiritual warfare with the hope of either relieving present distresses or attaining a “normal existence”. However, the purpose of all aspects of spirituality, warfare included, is to bring us into the image of Christ. Nothing, not worship nor warfare, neither love nor deliverance, is truly attainable if we miss the singular objective of our faith: Christlikeness.”
“We must realize that it is not Satan who defeats us; it is our openness to him. To perfectly subdue the devil we must walk in the “shelter of the Most High” (Ps. 91:1). Satan is tolerated for one purpose: the warfare between the devil and God’s saints thrusts us into Christlikeness, where the nature of Christ becomes our only place of rest and security. God allows warfare to facilitate His eternal plan, which is to make man in His image.”
- Fracis Frangipane, The Three Battlegrounds
I haven’t read ‘The Three Battlegrounds’, but I would like to. I found both of these quotes in Beth Moore’s “Praying God’s Word” – which is a great book to help initiate you into just that – praying the word.
‘The Genessee Diary’ Quotes
October 19, 2007
I’ve been trying to get my computer organized, and came across a document in which I’d saved some great quotes from Henri Nouwen’s, ‘The Genessee Diary’.
Several years have passed since I last read the book, but it does give great insight into monastic life, as well as a different glimpse into Henri’s life – as this is a bit different than many of his other works (because it is his actual journal over, what I believe, was about 7 months living in a monastery). Though even in “diary” form, there is still much wisdom and revelation shared throughout the midst of his journey.
This book wouldn’t be on the very top of my list to recommend – but nevertheless I’d still recommend it, along with most of any of his works (though I’ve not read them all… only a few.)
A few quotes from ‘The Genessee Diary’
Madeleine L’Engle Quote
September 9, 2007
Just read an interesting “Christianity Today” interview with Madeleine L’Engle – who you may have heard passed away earlier this week.
The article was originally published in 1979, and she seems to have a unique (hmmm… can’t quite find the right word to describe it, but unique isn’t quite right) perspective on things.
However, I particularly liked this quote:
“In a sense, praying and writing involve the same disciplines. When I sit down with an act of will, either before the typewriter or to pray, I have to let go of my control and listen. I listen to the story or I try to get beyond the words of prayer and listen to God. Ultimately when I hear, that is the gift, not my act of will, not my act of virtue. It is pure gift.
I guess my favorite analogy for the difference between faith and works came from Rudolph Serkin. My husband and I heard him play Beethoven’s Appassionata Sonata better than Beethoven could play it. When the last note faded away there wasn’t a sound. Then, slowly, like the ocean waves, the applause swelled. Later I realized that we had been present at a moment of transcendence, of transfiguration. What did Serkin have to do with that? He practices eight hours a day every day. I have to write every day whether I want to or not. I have to pray every day whether I want to or not. It’s not a matter of feeling like it, or waiting when I feel inspired, because both in work and in prayer, inspiration comes during rather than before.”
"Deep Conversion Deep Prayer"
September 8, 2007
I’ve been reading “Deep Conversion Deep Prayer,” by Thomas Dubay this week, and I would HIGHLY recommend it.
The premise of the book is based on a quote from Bernard of Clairveaux:
“There are more people converted from mortal sin to grace, than there are religious converted from good to better.”
Thomas Dubay goes on to explain, “… there are more men who give up serious alienation from God, mortal sin, than there are people who give up small wrongs, willed venial sins. And there are even fewer who grow in heroic virtue and live as saints live.”
He explains throughout the book how a TRUE repentance and returning (a “deep conversion”) and abiding in truth is required to go from self-centeredness to oneness with the Lord.
Here are a few more quotes from Dubay:
*Note: If “Fire Within” (also written by Dubay) is a little too thick and intimidating for you… this is a much smaller book, and probably not as overwhelming. Though, it is just as provoking!*
"The Spirit of Truth"
September 4, 2007
I have been continually provoked by a book called ‘The Spirit of Truth’ by Art Katz, of late. Over and over again I have found myself praying, “Lord, make me true.”
In the introduction Paul Volk says, “… perhaps the reason we so often cannot abide in silence is that we fear that it would only make more apparent the absence rather than the presence of truth in ourselves.”
and,”it is not by having truths, but by becoming true that we are saved.”
A few of Art’s quotes:
As an “Ihoper” I find myself constantly singing about truth, talking about truth, searching out truth… And yet, days, weeks, months, and (lord forbid) years can go by without my heart becoming more true – which only means more like Jesus. I find more and more how far I am from that reality, and yet it is a journey I long to remain upon.
I highly recommend this book – and the best part – it’s online and FREE. To download and read it go here. To read more of his free online writings (articles/books) – go here.
Art went home to be with the Lord recently, but has left behind a wealth of wisdom for us!! Here is his website. May you be as blessed by his teachings as I have!
Disconcerting and Convicting Thoughts On Pride
August 30, 2007
Not my own thoughts in this case… but Joe Thorn’s. (I honestly had never heard of him before I read this post. I found a link to his post on pride earlier today. And it has been convicting me ever since.
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Some excerpts:
“Andrew Fuller said that there is nothing in personal holiness that makes us more like Jesus than humility, and there is nothing in sin that makes us more like Satan than pride… The sin of pride is believed by many theologians to be the fountain of all other sins, and even the greatest sin there is.
C.J. Mahaney explains that, “Pride is when sinful human beings aspire to the status and position of God and refuse to acknowledge their dependence on him.”
In his sermon on The Prevention and Cure of Spiritual Pride Richard Mayo explains that the “pregnancy” of pride is a great danger. He says, “It is a big-bellied sin; most of the sins that are in the world are the offspring and issue of pride.” He gives a number of example. Here is a summary of most of them.
Pride gives birth to:
1. Covetousness – because you believe you deserve something more than others.
2. Ungodly ambition – because you believe that you are most qualified, and the idea of someone else being preferred over you is an insult to your perceived worth.
3. Boasting – because everyone should know who you are and what you have accomplished.
4. Contention – because in picking fights you feel a sense of superiority over those who may (or may not) be in error.
5. Unthankfulness - because you deserve everything you get!
6. Selfishness – because others do not!
7. Self-deceit – because it’s easier to believe you are something, when in fact you are nothing.
8. A judgmental attitude – because you believe the errors of others are much more serious than your own.
9. Gossip – because you look so much better when telling others how awful someone else is. Mayo said that the proud “endeavor to build their own praise upon the ruins of others’ reputation.”
10. Complaining – because God should have consulted you before orchestrating the events of your day/life.
11. Hypocrisy – because you must hide the truth, your own failures, in order to avoid shame and accumulate praise.
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As I read through this list earlier today, I was painfully aware of how I’ve operated in the majority (if not all) of those sins even in the past week! Blech!! Oh, but praise God for truth that leads to repentance! May I be fully aware of the darkness I have chosen to operate in my life. And when the Lord enlightens me to the darkness, may I wholeheartedly repent – asking Him for mercy, and running to His open and waiting embrace. And may He grant me grace to then walk in His light and truth!
Calvin and Hobbes Article
August 22, 2007
My husband and I are huge fans of Calvin and Hobbes. Well, I’m a fan… my husband is the HUGE fan.
I never cease to be amazed by the circumstances that cause Caleb to quote one of his favorite Calvin and Hobbes moments… And though I’m not as skilled at calling them to mind, I continue to grow in appreciation of the art and humor behind the comic strip.
I found this article entitled, “What You Can Learn From Calvin and Hobbes about the Message and the Medium,” by Fred Sanders (who I honestly had never heard of before this article.)
The article is both interesting and provoking about certain facets of christianity today. And he gives a shout out to Keith Green – SO he had me hooked.
Here is a quote from the article:
“With words and lives in place, maybe there’s room for a slogan or a coffee cup or something like that. Perhaps, as long as we know that lives and words are what it takes to carry this particular message, we can have some doo-dads as well, as reminders or cues. Perhaps.
Or perhaps not. Watterson was worried that the very existence of these products would sap the power from the real thing; that a million Calvin window decals would make the Calvin comic strip harder to read. It’s possible that too many ineffective Jesus reminders all over the place might have a degrading effect on our ability to read Jesus where he really is. The only way to know if that’s the case is to know our message as well as Watterson knew his. Watterson could spot a deviation from the integrity and fullness of the Calvin and Hobbes mystique in an instant. Do modern Christians have senses so well trained, or a grasp of the gospel message so acute, that we can spot such deviations?”
Read the whole thing here.
